Kimolisa Was Here

This looks like fun


I would like to watch this, but I doubt it will show down here


This has already been released but it looks crazy awesome.


That's it!! The next person who is travelling to NYC, I'm hiding in your suitcase. I can imagine one of the smaller theaters showing this. *sniff*

Honestly speaking, when I wrote the last post I really wasn't expecting feedback, but boy, did I get feedback!! First of all thank you for sharing your thoughts and this is one of the times I miss college where you can get together with a bunch of friends and just chat about a given topic. I wish I could have you guys over with a large pizza and a couple bottles of wine to just talk about relationships and anything else under the sun.

At first, I was a little taken aback because my ways of thought were being challenged, but then it dawned on me that that actually will help me grow as an individual and not be stuck in an outdated way of thinking. Awesome!!

So let's jump in, for those who haven't read the original post, click here, also check out the comments they have been very insightful. Now to address the comments:

What Do Women Want?
Robert Gibson asked a really good question, what do we as women want and to be honest some of us don't know. Society, aka the media, romance novels, Disney movies, rom com's, have given us a generic concept of what we want - tall, dark and handsome, sensitive yet masculine, blah, blah, blah - but then we have what we see in our immediate lives. Yes, a woman might be looking for a nice guy but then she sees how her single mom had to struggle and work to maintain the family without a man. She sees how to be strong and not needing a man but still expects her man to be strong and be a man because that is what society says she should expect from a man. God I don't even know if I'm making sense. LOL!

The only thing, I can say is know yourself, be the best you, when you got that down pack, be on the lookout for people who got their isht together. You see, when you have two whole people who know who they are and are just enjoying life they will only enhance each others' lives instead of bringing new drama.

Also check out this movie, I found it back in 2009 when I started blogging and it shows one of the sides to black relationships, it's called Diary of a Tired Black Man, here is the link to the post I did.

Two Alphas in The House
One of my friends from High School, astluce, pointed out that both she and her husband are Alphas. For real, this blew my mind and gave me hope. It also showed that I got sucked into the whole propaganda of men not being able to handle a strong woman. Looking back at it, I think it is the men who can't handle a strong woman that complain the most. *smh*

I mentioned before that I worked at a hardware store and it is only now I realize that some of those men don't know what to do with a strong woman. I know for a fact that I've toned down over the last seven years because I've seen actual fear in some men's eyes or they try to be condescending when or have the look of what should they do. Also in the construction industry down here, it's all chat and some of these men can't deliver, now I'm kinda pissed that I've changed to make others feel comfortable.

Truth be told (I'm going to be sappy here, I've accepted my sappiness and you should too) astluce and her husband are really a cute couple and their relationship is something to aim for. I'm just happy that they've pointed out that yes, two strong people can be together and make it work. It reminds me of the focus exercise Tony Robbins does in his seminars where if you focus on something, you see it wherever you look and if you really focus you can see very successful, strong couples.

I must agree with her, though, I may not find my significant other on this rock called Wadadli, perhaps I should hang out with the Italians down at English Harbour. "Ciao, bello!"

The Evolution of Gender Roles

source

Robby Breadner gave me hope by stating that not men are locked into gender specific roles. I always felt that I was wrong in being able to handle my own DIY stuff. I never came to work and proudly said how I fixed my toilet or installed a light fixture. That's not something women go around gloating about, but it's nice to know that as we evolve as humans we are doing away with traditional roles and just being human, doing what needs to be done.

The only thing is that not all of us are evolved. There are a lot of people who hold on to old ideas because they have never worked out what would work for them as individuals. They take them on as their beliefs and when those beliefs are questioned, they fight for them like wild cats.

There is a lot of talk about class warfare, but has anyone ever thought about ideological warfare. The divide between the thinkers and the non-thinkers, those whose lives are based on a true understanding of themselves and their needs and those who follow any and every thing, be it the latest dance hall tune to the drug dealer they look up to. The sad thing is, in Wadadli at least, I see the latter overtaking the island and creating more.


I really appreciate the insight from the comments to the last Why Am I Single post, I think they help me to escape the labyrinth of singledom. I'm going to stop here, because this post is long enough. Buena notte, tutti.

By far one of the hardest things I've ever done is prepare a Food Porn post while hungry. Pure torture, I almost ate my mouse pad. Bon appetit!

pics: Style.com

About The Talk

We all want customized experiences and products -- but when faced with 700 options, consumers freeze up. With fascinating new research, Sheena Iyengar demonstrates how businesses (and others) can improve the experience of choosing.

The Talk

I still have to catch up on my Resident Evil. I think I saw 1 & 2 and can't believe that they reach 5


I'm watching this because I am a Bruce Lee fan


The first trailer for this movie didn't grab me, but this one caught my interest


This looks so endearing. Plus I love Susan Sarandon.

I like the overall feel of this room, but I love the door on tracks. I would do that for an office and have a inset library where the door would cover when it's "open"

Answer #9: I don't need a man




Need I say more?

You see there was this guy that just gelled with me, but now looking back at it now (damn 20/20 hindsight) I kept pushing him away. I got mugged and I didn't tell him, I just glossed over it and I could hear in his voice that he would have wanted to hear about it, be there for me. After reading all these post you can see that I'm a little behind on things (book smart, street dumb).

Honestly speaking this post was inspired by this post I came across by Evan Marc Katz. The post was a response to an email from a woman who wanted to know if a smart, strong, successful woman can get a smart, strong, successful man. After reading this, I've come to the conclusion that the answer is no, that was when it really sank in. I've heard it so many times, in so many ways and only now do I get it.

There can only be one Alpha in a relationship. To be a successful person, you have to be an Alpha, for the most part anyway. And when you look at it in relationships you need to be with someone who compliments you and not be exactly like you. You know the whole yin and yang thing.
So the question I have for myself is

Honestly speaking, no, I don't want to be an Alpha.

I'm tired of being the strong one, the shoulder to cry on, the person people ask for advice or ...... Sometimes, most times, I want to turn to someone. I want someone else to take the wheel while I sleep in the backseat. Perhaps my ideal is the hybrid of the Alpha and the Beta, so that the roles are interchangeable.

Lord, I'm getting depressed now. What do you think, people?

• For those in relationships, are you the Alpha or the Beta? 
• For the ladies, do you think adopting the notion that you don't need a man hinders your ability to get a man? 
• Are women nowadays, pushing men away by not needing them financially and for protection, but more for emotional support? 
• Are we, as women, asking men to take on what used to be considered female roles?
• What are we really looking for in a partner?

Comment below and share your thoughts.

My sis introduced me to a new foodie site with a very obscene web address name. It's called Choose Me, Pick Me, Love Me and the next three pics and recipes are from that site.

About The Talk

We don’t just need better laws -- we need better culture. At TEDxTC Nate Garvis asks what we can do to create an environment in which powerful institutions are used for the common good.

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This is different. I'm not sure if I will watch it on the big screen...


This looks so interesting. Bruce Willis, Bill Murray, Tilda Swinton, so watching this.

This made me smile simply because he became successful doing what he loved. I want to watch this


Oh Lord. *smh*


I love it.... This like they just stepped out of the box, just in that space immediately outside of the box. I'm speechless...

This video reminds me of Love Potion #9.

Check out the movie, here.

Answer #8: I Don't Approach Men

Somewhere there is an unspoken (correction: spoken by those who are forthright enough to say it) rule that men are suppose to approach women. And it is because of this rule, women don't approach men. I guess there is also that feeling that men will not like it if a woman approach them. Perhaps, it will make a woman look desperate if she steps to a man. But here is a little advertised fact that I came across thanks to Paul Carrick Brunson, a modern day match maker,

The other day my mom turned to me and asked why all of a sudden I'm so into food. Truth be told, I think I was always into food. I remember that when I was a kid I used to bake cakes and cup cakes every Sunday (from the cake mix, shhh). I don't know why but every time I did the cakes they came out great, the right amount of moisture, just the the right amount of spongieness (yes, new word, people!). I even did a little business of selling the cakes to a family friend who ran a restaurant. Unfortunately, I stopped baking on the regular and I got intimidated by cooking a little, but I'm over it now and I'm all into trying new recipes. I also found another bookmarking site called Punch Fork, that is where I found the following pics and recipes. Bon Appetit!!

About The Talk

For a full year, A.J. Jacobs followed every piece of health advice he could -- from applying sunscreen by the shot glass to wearing a bicycle helmet while shopping. Onstage at TEDMED, he shares the surprising things he learned.

One of the things I want to get before I die is a samurai sword and this even made me want it more.

Handmade Portraits: The Sword Maker from Etsy on Vimeo.

I saw someone do this is Tumblr, and I must say it is a confidence booster (LOL). Basically, search for your name on Urban Dictionary and check out the many definitions submitted and voted on. Unfortunately, I have a very unique name so I used the parts of it and here are the results

Kim

kim	1886 up, 654 down
	adorable. kim is adorable.

Kim's are normally really hot woman. They have smoking bodies and are drop-dread gorgeous. They are also very sweet, and make amazingly supportive, perfect girlfriends, not to mention a hot body! They are completely adorable, but often get mistreated or understood by men. There hot body often make them very attractive, and most are blonde and complete sweeties.
All boys want a kim, because they are are so fucking sexy.

jon: That girl is so sexy, she is such a kim
Matt: Yeah, i really wanna fuck her
Jon: Nah, I want her as my girlfriend
Matt: you will have to fight me first

kim	1886 up, 654 down
	adorable. kim is adorable.

kim	1886 up, 654 down
	adorable. kim is adorable.

kim	1886 up, 654 down
	adorable. kim is adorable.

kim	1886 up, 654 down
	adorable. kim is adorable.

adorable.

kim is adorable.

The only woman that will bring chuck norris to his knees

Chuck Norris does not kneel, he bows to kim.

An intelligent and sexy female with LUSCIOUS physical features. Usually attracts weird guys named David who do absolutely NOTHING for her, but she still remains independent.

That Luscious Lisa...

An extremely smart and sexy female with great hair and a great face. Nice, sweet and generous are words that go along with Lisa. She is funny and giving. Not a slut by any means but does like to have a good time. Always ready to party and her phone is always ringing. She will even fly to another state for a house party. She is self confident and blessed with good genes. She just has it all; all other girls are extremely jealous of her.

I am so jealous you are dating Lisa.

a freakin AMAZING chica...anything but unattractive. Hell she is totally far from that. Can we say delilctible....Loves chinese food and tattoos. Loves moths doing there own kamakaze suicide atempts into flames. Usually a very good speller. And loves her little, should be, foreign car. And is always ready for a fun time.

Lisa: Whats another name for me?
Dustin: Delictable comes to mind.
Lisa: Hmmmm. I like it. Lets go get chinese and tats.

So if you have some free time, check out what people are saying about your name, you might be pleasantly surprised. Oh and here are some random names:

Michele

1.A girl who does not try yet always gets attention.
2.Musical girl with a modern siren like vibe.
3.A girl always causing men to "crash" due to her beauty.
4.Highly attractive female who could care less

-That girl is such a Michele!
-Man I wish my girlfriend could be like a Michele!!

Ijeoma

Safe Journey
~Originated from the Igbo Language
~Used to wish someone a safe travel or reply as to how your trip was.
~An extremely gorgeous human being.

Ijeoma

Abena

Usually a girl's name;
Very friendly creative person; talented artist for their age.
Very fond of comedy and laughing, though knowing when to be serious and address matters in a responsible way; someone who can always put a smile on your face in the darkest of times.
This girl uses very strange but comedic adjectives that always stifle a giggle, even out of the lamest person.

"Ha ha, Abena, you are so funny."

"That was such an Abena move."

Connie

Connie's are usually absolutely gorgeous girls. They have a love for bright colours and are usually hyper-active. They are known to come out with random things. Connie's are totally unpredictable! Boys are always chasing after Connie's (pffft not fair!!!) Everybody knows that if you are friends with a Connie you are special.
Connie is also a fish name.

Everybody wants to be a Connie!

Woah! Have you seen Connie? Ain't she gorgeous!

I'm jealous of Connie, she has half the school chasing after her!

Melissa

A very beautiful person inside and out.
Will always make you laugh and give you a hug before you even know you need one!
Can be some what blunt. But at least you know she is truthful. Very sweet and easy to talk to. Loves the colour pink and loves her family more than anything else!
High morals. She sets her own ground.

Melissa has everything in pink!

Okay, at first, I thought this was going to be like JackAss, I was wrong. This just blew my mind. I'm speechless.



Now for the last instalment my thoughts on the trailers featured on the playlist of trailers created by good friend and FB buddy, Ms Andreen S. Shall we....

13. I am not religious, but there is something about listening to a choir that does something to the soul. I love that they made this film because it's something that I would not have thought to make a film about, but now that it's made, it feels right. Does that even make sense?

14. Another film that should be made and watched. It's sad that this happens in America and that it has similarities to places like Iran and Afghanistan where women are imprisoned when they were raped. I want to see this film, I want to give this woman a hug and I want to see what happened to her.

15. This looks powerful. That's all I got to say.

16. I love how it takes poetry out of the books and gives kids a way of expressing themselves and uniting with others who are just like them. Growing up, I would just write, but it never was put out there for people to read and I'm so happy about how far technology and the human spirit has taken this art form. Simply Awesome.

17. I think I would like to take my mom to see this and ask if any memories come to mind. LOL! Can you imagine a documentary in the future about the music we listen to now. Lord, save us all.

18. I'm still not sure about this movie. Something in me tells me that it has many layers and deals with many issues that will leave people uncomfortable, but isn't that what like is about, being uncomfortable.


To Ms Andreen, great selection and I will try to find a way to watch some of these movies.

Answer #7: I'm Too Cynical

I have no shame in my game, I am telling it as it is and I am cynical. According to Google,

cyn·i·cal/ˈsinikəl/

Adjective:	Believing that people are motivated by self-interest; distrustful of human sincerity or integrity. Doubtful as to whether something will happen or is worthwhile.
Synonyms:	sardonic

There is a story so sit back and enjoy.

source

It was one of the last times I attended NYC Fashion Week and I had gone with some friends. Now, fashion week is all about going to the fashion shows which were usually in the tents at Bryant Part. The shows were scheduled for every half hour and just imagine fashionably dressed men and women herding in an out of beautifully decorated rooms. In between you can visit the sponsors various boots in the lounge area and sometimes there would be an liqueur company as a sponsor. That was the case that time or was it just a bar, whatever the case, I was drinking a cosmopolitan for the first time and getting tipsy.

Next thing I know, there is this carmel toned guy with the most divine eyes. I love eyes, I thought you should know. So he struck up a conversation, I found out he was a boxer and he had just boxed in Los Vegas. He even asked for my number which I gave him. I soon after left the tents and told my friend about him, she said it was probably a line.

Even before she said that I already had a negative dialogue going on in my head.

• He's probably looking for designers to start his own line of clothing;
• He's probably a player;
• He won't call;
• What does he really want?

Anyway, I made my way home and to bed (natural thing for me to do especially when I'm tipsy). In the middle of the night my phone rings, El Boxer is on the phone, asking me to go out the next night. Long story short, I said yes, then the next evening I chickened out using the excuse that they weather report was saying a hurricane was coming and I, being Caribbean, don't play around with hurricanes. Lame, I know.

Anyhoo, that evening I looked him up online. Turns out he is not just any old boxer but one of the top boxers in his weight class. Then, when I went to work the next day, I told my friend and some of my co-workers. One of them saw the fight he fought on HBO. Ain't that a bitch!!

The sad thing about it is that did not change my ways, I remained cynical. Not only was I cynical but I didn't believe in myself to think I could handle myself with a man of his caliber.

Now, I know some people who live in Antigua know Big Apple Deli. It was owned by an older couple and the husband was big in the boxing scene in Antigua. The walls of the Big Apple Deli are covered with pictures torn out of boxing magazines and guess whose picture is up there? Ain't that a bitch.

So how do I get over my cynicism? I think it is all about mental conditioning, perhaps wearing a rubberband around my wrist and snapping myself when I have negative thoughts or think negatively of others' intentions. Why is self improvement so hard? I will persevere, as God is my witness.

I'm sure it's cold where some of you are, hopefully this will inspire you to make a cup of hot chocolate and load it up with whip cream and chocolate syrup. So toasty.