Kimolisa Was Here

Black Zulu for the most part is a natural hair blog with a hint of lifestyle. Not only do we learn about maintaining natural hair, we go along a journey with Niki as she learns to love herself. This is something that a few of us can come to terms with as we had to face a society who is fascinated with the fairer skin. Just listen to the music or look at the amount of beauty stores that sell skin lightening cream.


This blog is great for those thinking about embarking on the natural hair journey as you learn the dos and don'ts, you can see the transition and in the mix you have some thought provoking posts on being dark skin. Check out the blog, and this is what she had to say about herself:

About The Blogger

I am the third of five children and the darkest of all four girls. Growing up, my Grandmother referred to me as “Black Zulu”. I can almost still hear the disdain in her voice as she called me that. My oldest sister loves animals and when her dog dropped a litter of puppies, the blackest of the black dogs was called ‘Niki’.

As a child, I never felt anything other than inferior because of my color.

As  a young adult, I remember when one of my cousins had her first child and I visited her in the hospital. Her mom, my Godmother, held her grandchild, who was fair skinned, and looked at me and said, “Nikki, when you have a child you better have it was someone light because when you were born you were a very black baby. Black, black, black, black.” I smiled.

I’ve also listened to too many men speak about their love for ‘browning’ [fair skinned women] and their disdain for extensions, weaves, braids or ‘nappy head’.

Now couple that with what we refer to in the Caribbean as “sal’ head” (the correct term would be hair that literally refuses to grow or ‘picky head’). I distinctly remember as a teen  having the notion that because I was the darkest among my closest friends I had to ensure that I was always dressed properly – I changed outfits (home clothes) more often than I dare to mention each day – and that my relaxed hair was always properly combed. I would relax my hair every opportunity I got. I could have just had a relaxer 2-3 weeks ago and my Godmother came to get her hair relaxed…I would use the left over relaxer in my hair right after her’s was done.

I was doomed from the get go.

Now, I am by no means saying that I had it ‘hard’ and back then I probably would have said that none of it bothered me….and I truly believed that it didn’t. But today, I am 27 and I refuse to date anyone whose complexion matches mine or is darker than mine. I have a horrible tendency to declare that I will not have a child with anyone who does not have or comes from a line of ‘good hair’.

Bottom line, I was affected.

It took a long time for me to look past my face and see myself as beautiful on a whole. I have a beautiful face, and I have always known that, but I never quite felt beautiful clothed in this dark chocolate complexion and crowned with a mass of ill-faithed hair.

Today, I am much more confident in who I am as a person. I am a delicate dark chocolate sista and my skin tone and length or texture of hair does not determine my aptitude or who I am as a person. I have embraced Nekisha and even tho I am still learning to accept every little thing that makes me ME, I am happy in the skin God has blessed me with! I am created in God’s likeness. When he made me, he looked at me and said “you are fearfully and wonderfully made!”

Black Zulu? From today, I wear that title proudly! It reminds me of where I’ve been but it also reminds me that it certainly does not determine where I’m going! Black Zulu is about taking something that negatively impacted you in the past and making it stand for something positive going into your future.

Today, I breathe life into Black Zulu with a fresh big chop (BC) and plans to embrace more of my natural side. This blog is my journey to loving me – utterly and completely – from my roots up!

This question popped into my head a few days ago and I found it a bit difficult to answer. It was a dynamic question, something that should be asked in the moment. To me, the question should be


After much thought, I figured the answer could be both. We are living and dying.

Everyday we are living our lives, working, going to class, studying, bumming around. The simple fact that we are breathing and moving around means we are living, but we are still dying.

In this moment our cells are dying. In a few years, all the cells in your body right now will be dead. Plus each day that passes means we are one day closer to death. And the crazy thing is we don't really know when we will die.

Sure, we assume that we will die at an old age, but think about it. Think about all the people you knew within your life time who have died as a child, in their teens, 20's, 30's 40's, etc. They all thought they would make it to their 70's, 80's, even their 90's. It wasn't guaranteed to them and it's not guaranteed to you.

Knowing that I am dying gives me the incentive to live. Because we think we have 30+ years to live, we believe we can put things off but look at the facts. Did you accomplish all the things you wanted to do in your teens? How about in your 20's? It's amazing how quickly a year passes as you get older. Before you know it a decade has gone by and you didn't grab that opportunity, you didn't start that thing, you didn't tell someone you loved them.

You keep putting it off believing there always will be a tomorrow. The truth is tomorrow is not guaranteed. You could be at the wrong place at the wrong time and lose your life, do you want your last moments spent lamenting over not telling your parents that you appreciated everything they've done for you and that you loved them. Or worse, do you want to be in your deathbed at 86 regretting not connecting with that person who vibrates at the same level as you.

Life is right now, this moment and you can choose to live, doing everything you want to do in your lifetime, or die, letting each day pass without taking the next step closer to your drams, your goals, a better version of you.

Every morning you make that choice, don't leave it to habit, don't leave it to chance. Make the concerted effort to choose living YOUR life.

So to you, and you on your desktop, you on your smartphone, you on you laptop and you on your tablet,  I have one question for you,

and no, I'm not being sarcastic. Monday's are now dedicated to inspirational images from my hard drive. The simple fact that they are on my hard drive means they are good.

Enjoy!

I can't recall where I got this image, but if it's yours, leave a comment and I will link it to you.

This week's Caribbean blog is Half -Broken Things. This blog showcases the words and images of Poet and Artist, Danielle Boodoo-Fortune. Basically, she lives the life I would love to live where she lives an artist's life and is recognized for her work. As you can see from the pic above, her work is amazing.

About The Blogger

Danielle Boodoo-Fortuné is a poet and artist from Trinidad & Tobago.

Her writing and art have appeared in several local and international journals such as Bim: Arts for the 21st Century, the Caribbean Writer, Small Axe Literary Salon, Poui: Cave Hill Journal of Creative Writing, Anthurium: A Caribbean Studies Journal, Dirtcakes Journal, Blackberry: A Magazine, Room Magazine and others.

Danielle was awarded The Charlotte and Isidor Paeiwonsky Prize by The Caribbean Writer‘s editorial board in 2009, nominated for a Pushcart Prize in 2010, and awarded the Small Axe Poetry Prize in 2012. In 2013 she was nominated for Best New Poets, and shortlisted for the Wasafiri New Writing Prize as well as the Montreal Poetry Prize.

Danielle’s first solo art exhibition, Criatura, was held at the Art Society of Trinidad and Tobago in June 2013. In 2013 her art was also featured at the exhibition Music is the Soul in Toronto, as well as The Femail Project in Birmingham, UK.

She is also the Creative Director of Wildflower Studio, a brand of handmade art inspired gift items.

Danielle lives next to a mango tree with her husband and her animals. She is currently editing her first collection of poetry for publication.

To learn more about this talented Caribbean blogger, artist and poet, visit her blog, Half-Broken Things, her website, and check out her etsy shop.

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Or Elizabeth if you are a Commonwealth country, or whoever is on your money.

Growing up life was simple, I only had to pay attention to the next step. Pass the test, pass the exam, move on to the next class. When I reached High School and nearing the end, it was pass CXC, go on to State College, then university in the US. After all of that get a job, get paid. This is where simple got complex, or does it?

Throughout those formative years, I never asked a very important question, a question that would have made adults uncomfortable, the simple question, why? Why go to school? Why go to State College? Why go to university? More likely than not, the answer would be to get a good job. Then like a child, I can't help but ask, Why should I get a job?

More likely than not, the answer would be to get money. Ah ha, so all those years were in preparation for me to get money.

Parents insist on their children getting tertiary education because they believe with the knowledge they acquire over the 2 - 10 years, their children will get more money than if they hadn't gone to the college/university/institute of higher education. But is that belief valid, does having a degree guarantee you a higher paying job? Plus why do you want to be paid more?

After college, I went in search of the holy job, holy because every politician from here to Timbuktu consider it holy. I built up to a job that was considered "ideal" for a person with a fresh degree and I hated it. No, hate is a strong word, I did not find pleasure in it. Sometimes I worked long hours, I did boring work that did not give me any satisfaction. I got paid well but I felt empty. I did it, I got the well paying job, but it made me question if this was it. Now what?

Now I have money, now I can buy things that will make me happy. But will the things make me happy? While I was spinning in my hamster wheel, I never once asked what made me happy. Even recently, I was in pursuit of Elizabeth. Almost everyday, I was either stressing about the lack of money or how to make/earn more money. Then the other day, I asked the questions I always ask myself every now and then,

What do I want to do?
How do I want to spend my waking hours?

And the same answer came to me as the other times I asked.


Simple, straightforward and still I wasn't doing what I wanted to do. I was chasing the dream that society, my parents say I should be pursuing. I created Bus Stop Antigua, a labour of love and whenever I mention a positive development with the site, be it more people visiting it, it being linked to from other sites, the one thing my mother asks is, "So when you going to make money from it?" It's now reach the point where I don't mention the site to her at all.

I've now reached the point where I would be content with having a decent job where I can meet my needs AND the time and space to do what I enjoy. The media and commercial entities pay big money to convince me to buy things and experiences I really don't want and need. At the end of the day, I am content with a nice house, a decent small SUV and plenty time to write and maybe take part in some mischief. With some work and guidance, I can become a professional writer and, that my friend, might explode my heart with happiness.

Money is nice, but happiness is nicer. I might not be making a million dollars, I might not be jet setting here, there and everywhere, but when I wake up, I will be looking forward to the day, not begrudging it. I won't have to convince myself that I have to get out of bed or I won't have a job and if I don't have a job, I won't make any money.


Moving forward, I won't be pursuing Elizabeth, I won't be pursuing Benjamin, I will be and I am pursuing that special place where happiness and peace resides. I might not live there all the time, but I will be visiting it a lot and I will be enjoying my stay.

Tomorrow is not guaranteed and it makes no sense doing something for money that will slip away like water through my fingers. It makes sense to me to spend the time doing what I love and if I'm lucky, Elizabeth might start pursuing me.

OXOX

I didn't plan to start off with bloggers I knew, but this is the beginning and there really aren't any rules. I met the blogger/poet behind Passion's Pleasure, Robert Gibson, through the FaceBook group, Writers & Artistes about two or three years ago. We've supported each others' poetry over the years by leaving comments. He introduced me to websites like dVersepoets where I have met other interesting poets.

His blog is mostly, if not entirely poems that are deep, as well as erotic. I believe it is through communities formed through the internet that poets have the opportunity to transcend the waters that divide. It is through the support that a poet like Robert can share his work and take the next step and publish his work. This brings us to the pic above which is the cover of his upcoming book of poems. Definitely check out his blog for more info, check out the FaceBook page for more info.

A little about the blogger, in his own words,

I have been writing from the time I could string sentences together and started writing poetry at about 14 or so, while at secondary school.  I was introduced to it during my English Literature class and fell in love with it. My first poem was called The Students’ Lament and it poked fun at the entire school – from my classmates all the way up to the principal.  I read it out to the class and had them gasping for air from laughter.

I thought to myself, “I might have something here.”

I have written for love, written in pain, written for worship, and written just for the heck of it all.  I love writing:  I used to say that if I never got married I’d marry a semi colon; it’s so curvaceous … yeah, I’m a nut like that.

Before the wonder of the Internet, I had my collection of poems typed out in a Word document – but then came the fateful day when cruel fate snatched my muse and stabbed her in the heart with a power spike – in one second, I lost all my documents on that hard drive – including over a hundred and ten poems.

Since this blog’s creation, I have transformed from a shy guy who expressed himself only through his poetry into a confident spoken word artiste, boldly seducing audiences through sensual poetry….

I was just Bajanpoet here …  but I have become The PassionPoet … or Passion, for short.

• Awareness
• Acceptance
• Pushing limits

Lets delve into them,

• Be full of laughter and mischief
• Be rich with support and respect
• Always have mutual attraction
• Be a great companionship
• Have a lot of expression of love and gratitude, spoken and otherwise

The first of this new series is Deep Fried Stilettos. A lifestyle blog focused a fashion and photography. I first became aware of Charity when she began to follow this blog and after seeing her blog, I began to follow it. What do I like about this blog? It's honesty, the fact that the photos are beautifully styled and of course she is a Caribbean blogger, not just Caribbean but Antiguan. Plus she has another element that differentiates her from fashion bloggers I've come across.

I guess it could be the unpolished yet professional feel. A lot of fashion bloggers have this uber perfect blog that seems to give lip service to brands. Deep Fried Stilettos has more of a vibe of getting the emotion across rather than trying to hard to appear fashion-y. That's just my take on it, check out her blog and form your own opinion.

Well, I'm Charity and I am 4 feet 11 inches of absolute crazy, breathless, utter joy, laughter and undiluted happiness.

I'm an island girl born and raised on tiny Antigua and Deep Fried Stilettos is my lifestyle blog. Most of my year is spent in Trinidad, working on finishing a Bachelors of Science Degree in Nutrition and Dietetics, but I don't always practice what's taught (Hello there Mr. Burger King!). 

Papa's a mellow, laid back Rastafarian and mum's an on-again, off-again vegan who's a huge believer in holistic living and tends to a wild forest rather than a garden. I was born a free spirit!

This space is stuffed with photos, adventures, style, lyrics, quotes, food and other lovely stuff.

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The funny thing about blogging for me is that when I'm not behind the computer, I think up interesting topics to write about and then when I'm ready to write, nada. My mind goes blank. As a result, I fall back on a topic I had in the back of my mine such as this one,

1. I used to model and I got paid. During my time in college, I used to model for the live model classes. Worry not, I had all my clothes on, it was fashion live modeling class. I did pretty well for myself, that is until I had to model in front of a class of my peers. LOL, I kept doing the same pose, it was so bad that the professor asked for more variety. I didn't do much modeling after that, but it was fun experience up until that point.

Oh and there was the time I modeled at the study abroad in Italy. The photographer liked the way I looked so he photographed some of the students for the college and me for the college's promotional material. I didn't get paid but I got out of class. That was fun too. For those who ever consider it for fun or as a profession, expect to be waiting around for some time for the photographer to set up, getting the right light, etc.

2. I am a recovering TV addict. I have a TV, but have not watched it in over a year. Yes, I would watch TV when I visit my parents, but I try to focus on the internet. If I'm not careful, I could watch TV all day. If I had cable, you would catch me watching Law and Order, in all it's forms, except Criminal Intent. I just can't figure it out, the criminals just piss me off on that show. I would also watch CSI, I love the Miami one because of the quips the main  guy would say. I watched New York and it just irked the crap out of me, so I will stick to Miami and the original. I got into NCIS, but I'm not too much a fan of the Los Angeles one. I have to keep away from the reality shows, especially Keeping up With the Kadashians (Team Khloe all the way), that ish is like candy, so yummy and so bad for you. Don't even get me started on Lifetime movies, chick flicks to the world!!

I think my rock bottom would be me in a room with Netflicks for a week, with take out menus. I would be off the grid and after that, I will never have the desire to watch TV again.

3. I hate worms, correction I am deathly afraid of worms. Okay that is a bit intense. I don't like worms. Upon seeing one, I will freeze up and stare at it just to make sure of where it is. Then and if it is removed, I will be on the look out for more. It is a bit weird since I like to eat spaghetti and rice. Also in the category is caterpillars, snails and slugs, but I've made peace with millipedes.

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This fear came from when I was a kid and I watched a movie with killer earthworms. They would swarm people and eat them. There was a scene that always comes to mind when the worms came through a shower head and attacked a person. Never liked worms since.

4. I am a geeky nerd and I love it. I love anime and comic books (hey, Archie comics are comic books). There was/is a comic store on the corner of 40th or 41st street and 7th Avenue in NYC. It was on the second floor and it was like heaven. Comic books of any kind and graphic novels.

Unfortunately, it's only recently that I discovered cosplay. To mix my love of comics with clothing construction, one word - squee. I wonder if it's too late to get into it. I'm tempted to create sexy costumes for carnival where I'm fully covered but still ooze sexuality. A sharp contrast to the skin-a-door of traditional mas costumes. It doesn't hurt that I found a tutorial on how to take my boobs from their present size to about a C, a D if I have enough socks.

5. I want to become Jason Statham. No, I don't want to be a short balding white guy with a british accent. I want to be able to do all the stuff he can do, or at least the characters he plays. For me to do this I will have to learn the following:
    ⁃    learn to drive stick shift;
    ⁃    learn to swim;
    ⁃    learn a martial art;
    ⁃    learn how to box;
    ⁃    learn to ride a bike;
    ⁃    learn to operate a handgun and either a riffle or a shot gun
    ⁃    learn spanish, mandarin and cantonese (I'm bond to find a spanish person or a chinese person anywhere in the world)
    ⁃    be cool under fire;

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Alright, now if I achieve all of these, I will be able to handle any situation including a zombie apocalypse (I told you I was a geeky, nerd).

Just imagine, if some shit goes down, I can either kick ass or escape by car, bike or swimming. It's called survival and being prepared.



Okay there you go, 5 things you didn't know about me. Yes, I'm like an iceberg, you don't know what lies below the surface.

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Last Word
Everyone has a story, something in their past that made them the person they are today, be it watching a bad horror movie in the 80's or a little quirk that you would never associate with them. One of the things that nourishes me is talking to people, learning about them and discovering they have their own dreams and fears. Sometimes we get so caught up in our own shit that we don't notice the person beside us, but if you take a moment and talk with them it will show you that your issues are not that big and the gratitude they have for you just listening to them will endear you to them for a long time. They say we are our brother's keeper, and  sometimes it's to keep our brother sane in an insane world.

XOXO